No Girls Allowed…

Flip Out Stoke

No girls allowed he said, oh no he didn’t, oh yes he blooming did. When Lil G first mentioned that he didn’t want girlies to come to his birthday party I may have chuckled a little, shrugged it off and thought I’m sure that isn’t the case. I know for certain that he plays with girls at school but more importantly we have a mixed circle of friends and he plays so well with both boys and girls. Which if truth be told is why it surprised me when I heard him say those three words. No girls allowed.

As the week’s have gone by he has become quite adamant to the point where he has reassured me that Mummy’s are allowed, as he could see that I was a little worried that even I would be struck off the list. But it’s ok he went on to say, because Mummy’s are allowed. You can still come Mummy. Just no girlies, OK? Phew. I guess this moment in time was inevitable really. He’s a boy and likes boy things. Whilst neither Mr H nor I have ever promoted gender bias toys, or pushed certain activities or colour preferences his way he certainly has found his own path. One where his favourite things to do are play football, pretend to be a mash up of one or all of his marvel heroes, completely put out if I suggest a pink t-shirt or shorts, and lets not forget a light sabre fight or two. As Lil G approaches the grand old age of five, ever stronger and completely in control (well mostly that is), I could see it coming.

Has his dislike for girls come from school, or is it simply his age and him finding his own voice? Personally I think it is the School playground. He’s picked up so many different words and dare I say it a little attitude since starting School in September. School has so much to answer for, although I’ll save that for another blog post!

And so, gone are the days of hiring a church hall and filling it with a room full of children, a face painter and multi coloured balloons, a gender neutral party if ever there was one. No more, we now have a list and it’s a long one. One that Lil G has written and core blimey I dare not deviate. We have ourselves a Flip Out birthday party booked with a strict no girls allowed policy, big boys only and let’s not forget they all must love Star Wars. The birthday cake has been ordered, it’s a surprise for the Star Wars loving soon to be five year old. May the force be with you kid. Eek.

Talk about making things difficult for handing out the invitations. And best of all he wanted to do this on the playground, rather than let his teachers secretly slip them into their school bags (which I may have mentioned more than once but sadly he did not listen), oh no, he wanted to personally hand them out, one by one to parent and child. And yes, wait for it, one little boy came up to Mr H and asked ‘do I have an invite? Sorry, you’re not invited (he didn’t say it quite like that). The poor little one looked so sneaped and then there was the look of horror on his mummy’s face and lets not forget the huddle and conversation that followed with another mummy. Oh dear. Will the ground open up and swallow me whole … were the words that appeared on my phone as Mr H left the school playground.

5th Birthday Party Invitations, Photobox

These same words are the ones I am dreading having to say when it is my turn on Friday. We have a few more invitations to hand out and poor Mr H has refused to go down that path again! I don’t blame him. It’s down to me, I have to suck it up and join in. Or maybe I’ll just distract Lil G as much as possible and hand them to the teacher, but we all know that isn’t going to happen now don’t we. Although I have to say helping Lil G to write out the names to those children he wants to invite was a very special moment indeed. His handwriting seems to have come on leaps and bounds recently. Certainly left me feeling one proud mummy and distracted me from the dreaded invitation drama I am about to experience! Eek.

Birthday Party Invitations

Birthday invitations

Friday’s are usually a day I look forward to, it is my day to do the school run, my day to be a school mum. I usually have a spring in my step as we walk into the School gates, enjoying the five or ten minutes amongst Lil G and his friends, catching up with the mummy’s and daddy’s who we have grown to know so well. Standing together, watching over as they play, laugh and run their little legs off before the door opens and we kiss them goodbye. Not this week. I’ll be the one wearing a cloak, hat and sunglasses. A mummy in disguise, desperate not to be recognised in the event I get asked why are girl’s not allowed, or am I invited?

I can hear all the gender neutral party mums poking at me. Sneering at me from behind the school gates. I don’t want to be that parent who is ostracised on the school playground or worse still the one to make a little one feel left out. It isn’t about that. You see, I have taken direction from the birthday boy. Lil G has made the decision not to invite girls to his birthday party and I think that’s ok. After all it is his party. I don’t want to inadvertently offend another parent or their child, but truthfully it really is down to Lil G. If he wants a no girls allowed birthday party then that’s what he shall have. And there we have it, a birthday party planned by the boy himself.

Flip Out Stoke

The no girls allowed rule is a decision that has troubled me, it isn’t about exclusion, it isn’t about being tight (maybe a little bit as blooming hell thirty kids is ridiculous), it’s about Mr H and I giving Lil G the birthday party he so desires. After all who wants thirty kids running round a church hall screaming, with half of them completely unknown to us. I considered trying to persuade him, testing him on his invite list, dropping in a girls name to see his reaction and then I thought, why should I? It would appear that there is a children’s party etiquette I am breaking, the rule that you should invite the whole school class. Oh yes, thirty blooming children. I don’t think so. Here’s to making new rules. Invite who you want.

Or maybe it is just me being paranoid, and like me they don’t really care or want to spend another Sunday morning at a School birthday party, but do so to please their child. Well mummy’s and daddy’s there will be tea and cake for the adults so fear not you will survive this birthday party!

Have you had a girls or boys only party?

KA x

And then the fun began...
The KA Edit
The KA Edit

I’m Kerri-Ann or KA as my friends call me, always found with a cup of coffee in one hand and my camera in the other. I have a huge passion for photography, fitness, fashion and family travel. I started this blog in 2014. It began as my creative outlet after becoming a mummy to our little boy George Archie. I started out blogging about parenting and over the years it has evolved into a blog that covers lifestyle, fashion, family and travel. Today TheKAEdit is ultimately a life and style blog. Thank you for reading x x


  1. 3rd May 2016 / 9:30 am

    Hope all goes well with Lil G’s birthday party – it must be difficult to hand out the invites on the playground knowing that not all the children can have one – but I’m with you in that I think they should be allowed to invite who they want. We’ve not yet had a birthday party where the birthday girl is in control and we’ve tended to keep the invites for her particular friends only and keep it fairly small.

    • Life As Our Little Family
      3rd May 2016 / 7:02 pm

      Aww thank you. Yes in hindsight we should have said no to handing them out so publicly but I’m all for letting some things go and I guess at some time little ones need to learn what rejection feels like although maybe not at 5 🙁

  2. 3rd May 2016 / 10:13 am

    Hi Kerrie-Ann, Oh it’ so hard when you get to this stage! I know exactly how you feel. We started to put a limit of 10 or 15 on birthday parties when Seb started to want to go to Jump Nation or Legoland etc.. You simply can’t afford to invite the whole class so then comes the tough decision of who to invite. Plus I found it used to get overwhelmed by big parties anyway. I’ve always left it up to Seb as I agree with you, it’s their special day and they should have their special friends there to share it. It’s hard when they don’t choose the children of the mums and dads you’re friends with though! And handing out the invitations eek! I’ve started texting invites to parents now to avoid those awkward mornings! I hope he has a really lovely day. xx

    • Life As Our Little Family
      3rd May 2016 / 7:10 pm

      They’re just so expensive per head and really I had to question how many children he’ll actually play with or truly want to share his special day with. You’re right it is their day and as this year it is on his birthday I wanted it to be just as he wanted it! x

  3. 4th May 2016 / 7:48 am

    I actually thought he had a friend called scar…then noticed the O! What a little cutie…they totally pick it up from others. No 2 parents have the same boundaries that you have, so before you know it the ‘but x is allowed’ urgh!! Hope the party is flip tactic xx

  4. 4th May 2016 / 4:15 pm

    I find this really interesting and yes I wouldn’t have maybe let them be handed out in front of everyone, especially when it’s their first school birthday. However, Lil G should be able to have the party he wants. Would I do it different? Maybe, but then again, probably so would you, this is Lil G’s thing and you live you learn. I wouldn’t be offended by a no girls allowed at all, and I have three girls, I would struggle with little boys that feel left out but oooh it really is a toughie. Best of luck with the party though, I loved seeing the pics of him writing his invites and I LOVE that he knows his own mind.

    • Life As Our Little Family
      4th May 2016 / 8:08 pm

      I know what you mean, it’s his first school birthday but he’s one of the last parties in his school year with being the youngest so i’m sure people are done with parties. Lots of girls have had princess parties etc. They all celebrate in school together with a birthday song, card & badge so to a degree the whole class get involved. I believe in no regrets, I wouldn’t change what we’ve done as I think you have to allow your little one to go down their own path, everyone has to learn that and although they’re young you can’t win everything or be invited to everything. I don’t want any little ones to feel left out but I also think that’s down to the parents to explain. We are all realistic in that parties of this nature for 30 kids would cost the blooming earth 🙂

  5. 4th May 2016 / 7:52 pm

    I can just imagine the embarrassment of someone asking where there invite it, argh! But to be fair I wouldn’t let Lucas go up and ask someone that as I know people are limited to who they can invite. When Lucas was in nursery they seemed to be inviting the whole class but now they are much more select thank goodness! I never take offence, everyone is different and the child should be able to decide who is there and who isn’t! Sounds like you’ve got a great party planned for him 🙂 xx

    • Life As Our Little Family
      4th May 2016 / 8:09 pm

      Aww thank you lovely, you’ve put my mind at rest. Like you I wouldn’t let G go and ask the question, I guess sometimes they just have a mind of their own. I hope you’re well x

  6. 6th May 2016 / 10:01 pm

    Great post! I broke the ‘party rules’ really early on. Grace was still in year 2 when she decided that she wanted a girls only party at build-a-bear. It wasn’t easy but I just thought well, this is what Grace wants and tough if others don’t like it! I am sure I had the playground gossipers complaining but let ’em! 😉 Hope he had a wonderful time #TheTruthAbout

    • Life As Our Little Family
      7th May 2016 / 5:32 am

      Aww thank you lovely, that makes me feel so much better, love your attitude x

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